Update 67
Ek shyam ko Joginder ji ke ghar par drinks le raha tha ki discussion China main Wuhan COVID-19 pe chala gya,
Main - aapko lagta hai kya India bhi effected hoga,
Joginder ji - bhai aaj kal sab inter connected hain, daily flights hain, effect to hoga hi,
Aunty paneer pakode leke aayi,
Aunty - aapne bete ko pistol de di wapis,
Joginder ji - haa, laga li isne peeche,
Aunty mere paas baith gyi aur mere pant ko kholne lagi,
Aunty - mere wali pistol nikal na,
Joginder ji - are lights to band karlo,
Aunty - aap karo na, hum dono to busy hai, khada hoja bete, pant utar de,
Main khada howa aur pant utar di, Joginder ji uth ke main door aur lights band karne gye,
Joginder ji - yaar uska kya naam hai, us BMW wali ka,
Main - Neeta Mathur,
Aunty jhuk ke lode ko choosne lagi,
Joginder ji - yaar dil aagya bete uspe,
Main - nhi degi uncle, aap bhul jao, bhut pyar karti hai mere se,
Joginder ji - shit yaar, main club mein hi koi waisi dundta hu,
Main - woh reception pe ek nyi rakh lo na,
Joginder ji - haa, ek vacancy bhi hai,
Main - waise ek mere setting hai Mall main, usko pauch leta hu, waise salary kya hai,
Joginder ji - reception pe 30 hazaar,
Maine Nagma ko call kiya aur samjhya, woh maan gyi,
Joginder ji ne beech mein ishara kiya ki abhi bula sakta hai kya?
Main - tu abhi aa sakti hai kya,
Nagma - haa, aapko kabhi mana kiya hai kya,
Main - woh mere uncle jo job denge wohi tere ko rakhenge apne liye, bas,
Nagma - aap kar rahe ho to thek hai, bharosa hai,
Main - haa, kuch bhi galat nhi hoga, bas uncle se hi karna hai,
Nagma - aged hain kya,
Main - hmmm,
Nagma - fir kya karenge, he he he
Main - hmmm, samjh gyi tu,
Nagma - aap address batao,
Humari baatein sun ke aunty ne lode se muh hataya,
Aunty - Joginder, maine phele bhi bola yahan ghar pe koi ladki nhi aayegi, mera ghar hai, koi randikhana nhi,
Main - are aunty, mere friend hai, koi rand nhi hai,
Aunty mere ko gusse se dekhne lagi,
Aunty - sach bol raha hai tu, dekh beta manti hu,
Aur mere lode ko masalne lagi,
Mere ko itni jor se hasi aane lagi, fir bhi main chup raha,
Main - haa sach bola raha hu, aap maje lo, chooso isko, uncle ko bhi maje lene do na,
Yeh bol ke aunty ka sir neeche kar diya,
Aunty - thek hai, aap fir goli kha lo, jab tak woh aaye, nhi to aapka khada bhi nhi hoga,
Ab to main khil ke jor se hasne laga, Joginder ji mere gaal pe dheere se thapad maar ke chale gaye,
Jab Nagma aayi, to aunty kitchen main thi, Joginder ji bhut muskara rahe the, Nagma mere paas baith gyi, maine apni aur keecha usko aur kiss kiya, fir apna glass usko de diya,
Main - kaisi lagi uncle, mast hai na,
Joginder ji ne muskurate howe apna peg sip karne lage,
Main - sun, uncle ko kush rakhna, tere life set hai, salary bhi double hai, aur apne boyfriend ko chhod dena, ab level upar karle apna, ache kapde le lena, main paise dunga,
Nagma - nhi, waise bhi aapne bhut diya hai, aapne, nhi chahiye,
Joginder ji - are beta, ab main de dunga paise,
Main - jaa Nagma, uncle ke paas baith ja,
Nagma muskara kar uncle ke paas baith gyi aur Joginder ji ke jang pe hath ferne lagi,
Joginder ji mere ko dekh kar muskara rahe the,
Aunty apna peg leke aayi aur mere sath baith gyi,
Aunty ne Nagma ko dekha fir mere se boli,
Aunty - nice choice bete, kyu Joginder?
Main - sab aap logon ke liye hai, deko uncle kitne kush hai,
Aunty - hmmm, inki lulli fadfada rahi hai,
Aur hum dono hasne lage,
Aunty - tere drinks hogye to under chalen,
Main - abhi ruko na, uncle ko kush dekh ke acha lag raha hai,
Aunty - bas dekh liya, tu chal na,
Hum room main aye, to aunty mere se lipat gyi,
Aunty - tune mara un dono ko? Joginder bol raha tha, kitne maar diye, das?
Main - haa meri jaan,
Aunty - hai, mere ko ek khuni se pyar hogya hai,
Main aunty ke chutad gown ke upar se masalne laga,
Main - tu high class rand hai mere,
Aunty - hai, tere gaaliyan sunne ko taras gyi main, humari society main koi nhi deta,
Main - to loda bhi koi nhi chuswata tere se, bhen ki lodi,
Aunty - hai, besharam, aaja bed pe,
Main - kyu chudna hai kutti,
Aunty - garam ho gayi hu, main,
Main - khol, nangi hoja, tu,
Aunty ne gown khol diya aur main bhi nanga hogya,
Aunty - kya chodta hai tu, tere se shadi hoti na mere, maja aata jindagi ka,
Main - abhi bhi loda tere hath mein hi hai na, rand,
Aunty - believe me, no one can even talk faltu with me and you abuse me like i am your bitch,
Main - tu kya, bhen ki lodi, tere beti bhi mere bitch hai, ab to paise bhi chuka diye tere, ab koi ehsaan nhi hai tera, sirf pyar karta hu isliye chodta hu tere ko,
Aunty - main bhi bhut pyar karti hu tere se, kabhi chodi itni high class lady tune,
Main - chodi na, teri nanad, meri Mami,
Aunty - woh best kam kiya jindagi ka tune, saali ko bhut attitude hai, aisi snobbish lady maine nhi dekhi,
Main - yaar uski beti pe dil hai, saali chodne nhi deti,
Aunty - beta woh choti si hai abhi, chhod usko, Nisha ko bula leti hu main,
Main - nhi, rahene de, tu choos ab lode ko,
Aunty - hmmm,
Aunty loda choosti rahi aur main uske chutad masalta raha,
Main - tu bhen ki lodi aaj gand marwa le,
Aunty - jaan nikal gyi thi jab tune yeh supada daala tha,
Main - are gand becha mat kar na, dheele chhod diya kar,
Aunty - dar lagta hai na,
Main - tere beti ne to marwa li thi,
Aunty - woh bhut excited ho jati hai tere sath, usko husband hi aisa mila na,
Main - tere America wali beti ke do betiyan hai,
Aunty - hmmm,
Main - chodne layak hai kya,
Aunty - tune unki maa to chodi nhi, baatein karta hai,
Main - aare, aayegi tab chodunga na,
Aunty - waise ek baat hai,
Main - kya,
Aunty - dekh main badi beti ke bhut close hu, hum dono sath drink karte hain, to maine usko bataya ki Nisha ko kaise pregnant karwaya,
Maine aage hoke aunty ko kiss kiya,
Main - sahi chali to mere jaan, mera batya,
Aunty - hmmm,
Main - thanks, ab easy hoga chodna usko,
Aunty - pura to sun le,
Main - tune apna batya, ki tere ko bhi chodta hu,
Aunty - nhi re, maa hu, impression kharab padega, lekin yeh jaroor bola ki Nisha ke jane ke baad mere se flirt karne laga hai,
Main - hmmm, sahi style se story develop ki tune,
Aunty - aur kya, bhut intelligent hu main,
Main - pics dikha na uske pariwar ki,
Aunty phone main pics dikhane lagi,
Main - tere beti thek hai, chalegi lekin uski badi beti moti hai, choti sahi hai figure,
Aunty - abe choti 16 ki hai, tu uski maa tak hi ruk,
Main - le legi loda, aunty,
Aunty - haa le to legi, lekin nhi,
Main - tu na apni nanad, mere Mami jaise mat kar,
Aunty - yaar to choti ladkiyon ke kyu peeche pada hai, mere beti tak thek hai, uski betiyan nhi,
Main - koi aur chode to thek hai, aur main chodu to nahi, are wah,
Aunty - mere jaan choti hai,
Main - chal chod na, abhi konsi aane wali hai,
Aunty - sun, tere ek pic usko dekhni hai,
Main - yeh raha loda, iski bhej de,
Aunty - pagal ho gya kya, woh puche gi mummy lode ki kaise bheji,
Main - majak kar raha hu, Joginder ji ke paas hai ek, golf course ki, Mama ji ke sath, unse leke bhej dena,
Aunty - chal thek hai, mere badi beti pasand hai na,
Main - hmmm, iska pati aisa kaisa hai, mota
Aunty - are desk job hai, baithe baithe mota hogya,
Main - chal chod apan chodte hain,
Aunty - beti ki nhi lega,
Main - aise kon deta hai, woh kya America se chudne aayegi yahan, chod na,
Aunty - to bole to main kuch sochu,
Main - rahne de, tu tange khol rani, aur neeche takiya laga,
Maine aunty ki tange uche kari, aur lode ragadne laga chut pe,
Aunty - saale, rand ki tarah treat karta hai mere ko,
Main - acha, tu mere rand nhi to aur kya hai,
Baad main jab main bahar aya to Joginder ji bhi kar chuke the, maine Nagma ko Fortuner main baithne ko bola aur uske Mall ki taraf chal diya,
Main - kab se joining boli uncle ne,
Nagma - jee kal se, sir
Main - kush kar diya uncle ko,
Nagma - hmmm,
Main - tere fikar rahti hai mere ko, isliye tere ko set kiya waha, ab ache se kaam karna, aur kisi se mat chudna, tu bajaru aurat nhi hai, tu bas apne job pe concentrate kar, aur uncle ko kush rakh, bhut high post pe hai government main,
Nagma - jee Sir, aap bhut ache ho sir,
Main - baad main car le lena, aur ghar bhi, family pe concentrate karna, respectfully jeena, kabhi bhi kisi se pyar mat kar baithna, koi pyar vyar nhi hota, sab jhut hota hai,
Nagma - jee sir, lekin ek baat bolu,
Main - haa bol mere jaan,
Nagma - maine agar kisi ko dil se pyar kiya hai, woh sirf aap ho,
Main - main bhi karta hu isliye to tere ko ek achi jagah set kiya hai, samajh na,
Nagma - sir aap ko mere abbu se milwana chahti hu,
Main - haa koi issue nhi, jab bolegi main aunga,
Nagma - main aapko call kardungi sir,
Main - haa, always ready, mere jaan,
Nagma - thank you sir, aap ne bhut kiya mere liye, aap jab bologe main aungi,
Main - nhi Nagma, ab tu apni life ko sudharegi, ab apan woh sab nhi karenge, bas
Nagma ko Mall pe utar ke maine jab door band kiya, woh driver side pe aagyi, uski aankhon mein aasu the, maine hath bhar nikal ke uske aasu pauche, aur uske gaal se hath ferene laga,
Main - mat ro, Nagma,
Nagma - aapne relationship end kar diya, rona to aayega hi na, sir,
Main - nhi end kiya, apna relationship kabhi khatam nhi hoga,
Nagma - mere ko aap nhi bulaoge na,
Main - hmmm, tere future ke liye, Nagma,
Nagma - aisa future kis kaam ka jisme aap na ho, mere ko pata hai kya acha lagta hai, sabe jyada is jindagi main, sir,
Main - kya,
Nagma - jab main nangi hoti hu, aur aap nange mere uper hote ho, mere chut main jab apne hath se apka loda set karti hu, woh scene mere jindagi hai sir,
Main - to kya chahiye jindagi main tere ko,
Nagma - aap se chudna sir, nangi hoke, please mere se mere haq mat cheno, hath jodti hu aapko, pao pakdti hu aapke, mere haq mat cheno, maine kabhi paise ke liye nhi kiya, main pyar karti hu aapse ,sir, please, mere haq mat cheeno mere paas as aur kuch nhi hai jeene ko,
Nagma jor jor se rone lag gyi, uske aansu uske gaalon pe bhene lage, woh rote howe mere ko dekh rahi thi,
Maine charon aur dekha, andhera tha, koi nhi tha, maine door khol ke uska hath pakad ke floorboard pe khada kiya, woh mere se lipatne lagi,
Main - ruk, chaddi utaar tere,
Nagma ne wahi, apni chaddi utaar di, maine dashboard pe rakh di, aur apni zip khol ke loda bahar nikal liya, Nagma ne aage bad ke usko pakad ke masalne lagi,
Loda tan gya, maine seat peeche ki, aur Nagma ko ishara kiya, ki aa baith ispe,
Nagma - nhi sir, aise haq nhi lungi,
Main - fir kaise,
Nagma - Nagma ispe tabhi baithegi jab aap apne muh se mere haq hamesha ke liye wapis doge,
Main - chal thek hai, tere haq diya tere ko,
Nagma - main aapki hu na, hamesha ke liye,
Main - haa,
Nagma - kabhi alag nhi karoge na,
Main - nhi,
Nagma - aise baat fir nhi bologe na,
Main - nhi,
Nagma - i love you, sir
Main - i love you Nagma, chal aaja baith mere lode pe,